If cats could go to the mall,
    what would they buy?

I am sooooo totally sick of hearing the word, "no". How about breaking down & buying me some
cat furniture
of my own so that I have somewhere better to sharpen my claws than your good couch?

Are you AWARE that I have a birthday? Might I suggest you have the common courtesy to buy me some
cat toys & gifts for the auspicious occasion??

Did you know the Surgeon General recommends at least 20 hours of sleep a day for cats? I didn't think so.
Get me a new
cat bed,

My place in the Hamptons bores me. I need something local. My real estate agent recommended these kitty condos.

Cat Trees, please.

News Flash! I don't enjoy eating out of a CAN! These
designer cat food bowls
meet my standards.

I'm feeling rustic yet stylish. Pick me up one of these
luxury pet tents, please.

I feel so bloated lately. My personal trainer told me to get a
kitty gym,
or else.